Ms. Steinem and the Freedom to Say “Yes Sir”
Updated: Sep 21
Gloria Steinem spent sixty years winning women the right to their own money. She died as tradwives argue it away.
We lost another great yesterday. Gloria Steinem, fearless advocate for women's rights and social justice. After 92 years of ceaseless fight, Gloria deserves to finally rest at peace. May she do so alongside other badass women, like Dolly Parton, Rosa Parks, Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg, and Ida B.Wells, who spent their lives advocating for justice while also rocking out their true selves, whether in mini-skirts or rhinestones and wigs.
Gloria's work on this earth was not done. To the contrary, it seems culture is in many ways reverting back to the time before she had even started her fight. Just this week, Vanity Fair reported on the new trend of tradwife teens, married influencers between 17 and 21 who live to say "yes sir." They cook and clean and rear the children.
And they firmly dismiss the disaffected former tradwives who tell them to "stash emergency money away from their husbands." The irony? Building an audience, negotiating brand deals and drawing an income from a phone is a profession, one open to these influencers only because women before them won the right to work in their own names, sign their own contracts and keep what they earned. Today’s “tradwife teens” are using that great feminist legacy to tell millions of other young women to hand the checkbook back to their men. But it’s not just ironic. Coming at a time when the champions of second wave feminism are being laid to rest, it’s also tragic.
“I’m 19 years old, married, no degree, no 9 to 5, and I’m exactly where I want to be.” -Ava Ahavat
Women’s financial independence, which tradwife culture is now rejecting, was a fundamental part of Gloria’s fight throughout her life:
Gloria Steinem was also behind the founding of Ms. Magazine, the magazine I honored in naming this very Substack. Why “Ms.?” For centuries a man carried one title his whole life, while a woman carried two, each announcing whether a man had claimed her (Miss for single and Mrs. for married). The idea that a woman should be addressed without reference to her marital status did not take hold until the 1960s, when a civil rights worker seized on “Ms.” as “a title for a woman who did not ‘belong’ to a man.” In 1969 she raised the idea of this new title during a lull on a local radio station, fortuitously reaching Gloria Steinem’s ears just as she was hunting for a name for her new women’s rights magazine. The first issue of Ms. hit newsstands in 1972, putting the title in front of the whole country as a way to address a woman on her own terms.
While I mourn the loss of Gloria Steinem, I also feel honored to have shared my time on this earth with her. Her strength, perseverance, and authenticity made life freer for many, including me. Without the advocates who came before her and worked alongside her, I could not have been a business owner or a financial advisor or, God forbid, both! When I launched Siena Private Wealth in 2019, nobody asked me for a man’s signature, questioned whether a woman should even be a financial advisor, or who would take care of my kids if I was working. My own freedom to choose my profession and lifestyle is a testament to the hard work of the advocates who came before.
Gloria disliked the question of who she would pass her torch to. She kept her torch, she said, and used it “to light other torches,” because one person holding the only flame struck her as the problem rather than the solution. So rather than carrying hers, here at Ms.Money I will, in my small way, keep my own lit and try to light others: sharing knowledge, encouraging discussion, and inspiring the women who read this to understand what their money is for.
“I’m often asked if I’ll be passing the torch onto someone else. I say no, I won’t be passing it on. I’m using it to light the torches of others. The idea that there’s only one torch is part of the problem.” -Gloria Steinem
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